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Homeland Security News

Train to Become a D.H.S Public Relations Officer!

D.H.S PR Officer Dress Code

Script for Conducting Your Own Roundup!

Handy list of Subversive organizations

Top 10 Things You Can Do to Make America More Secure

Totalitarian Information Awareness Program

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D.H.S PR Officer Secret Dress Code

Please dress professionally to be a DHS PRT officer: black pants and shoes with a white, blue or light colored dress shirt, tie back long hair, etc. Some shirts may be available. Members of the public may wear clean, respectable civilian clothing. Leaving backpacks at home will help your appearance and presentation.

Persons who participate in the training will also receive a simple script, any-one-can-do-it practice roleplays, a legal briefing, safety tips, "10 Things You Can Do to Make America More Secure" handouts, and attractive DHS identification patches!  
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"... History has called our empire into action. History has placed a great challenge before us: Will America -- with our unique position and power -- blink in the face of history, or will we lead to a freer, more civilized world? There's only one answer: This great empire will lead the world to safety, security, peace and freedom. May God bless America."

                       -President George w. Bush

"Terrorism must be decontextualized"

                          -Richard Perle?


The Homeland Security Advisory System is a means to dissimulate information regarding the risk of terrorist acts by federal, state, and local authorities against the American people.

Oblivious = Green

Prozak-ed = Blue

Elevated = Yellow

Paranoid = Orange

Terrified = Red

threat level

legally of course, this site is a spoof.  Any similarity to the official Department of Defense and White House sites is purely a matter of humorous coincidence